Manifestations: Personal Revelation and Art

Several months ago I was working through in my mind a project I was writing for my friend Danor Gerald and Jaclyn Hales. Danor and Jaclyn are very talented actors and I was hoping to design a show especially geared towards their particular talents. I originally was thinking of a one man show for Danor, which later turned into a two person show that included Jaclyn. I was really wracking my brains for this project and putting in some prayer. It was elusive... I didn't know what kind of show it was, what form it was going to shift into, nor the approach I should take. I was literally thinking it about for weeks, ranging from a one man show about Barack Obama to a Church play about African American throughout the history of the Church to a kind of post modern, surrealist play. Some of the ideas were getting kind of odd and nothing seemed to stick, nor did they ignite a passion to write. I was getting frustrated over the apparent stupor of thought.

One night, however, as I laid in bed, unable to sleep, I was literally overcome with a rush of thoughts and feelings. I don't remember there being much of a prelude to the onslaught of beauty and mental activity... I'm not sure if I was even thinking about the play. But suddenly my mind was alert with a flurry of thoughts and the play's essentials formed quickly in my mind. I had recently written a lot about mythology in my play Prometheus Unbound, and less directly in my play about C.S. Lewis, Swallow The Sun. I'm in love with the ideas that C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien discussed about Christianity being the "true myth." I believe that the Holy Ghost has revealed truths in many cultures and many mythologies, a kind of pre-existent memory that comes tumbling out in the form of stories. It connects in my mind to the psychologist Karl Jung's idea of a collective consciousness, and to Joseph Campbell's re-occurring mythical archetypes he discusses in A Hero of a Thousand Faces. That night this idea of "true myths" came back with a vengeance to me and it soon turned in a collection of world myths, connected by certain loose themes and two characters telling each other stories as their world fell apart. It formed into a very visual piece, with lots of multi-media and has since become one of my personal favorites of my work and I'm very excited for the time when the funding will be in place to do it right.

But, again, I was at a loss for a title that would encapsulate the ultimate meaning of the play, until I was driving to work one day and I was thinking about a title for the piece. The word "manifest" suddenly came to me. It really struck me, deeply. The more I thought and thought about it, the more appropriate it seemed. It's connection to Moroni's promise in the Book of Mormon came to me, "... if ye shall ask with sincere heart and real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." (Moroni 10:4-5).

Since then it's been interesting how often I have found that word "manifest" repeated in all the standard works, especially the Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants and The New Testament. I keep stumbling upon it, and it usually has to do with revelation through the Holy Spirit or Christ manifesting himself to his people. If you look up the word "manifest" on the scriptures on LDS website (within the text, heading and footnotes) it comes up with 132 separate occurrences of the word. This idea of spiritual manifestations, of the Lord manifesting himself, can be found in everything from Genesis: "In a mount the LORD shall be manifest (seen)" (Genesis 22:14, footnote b); to the Gospels: "For there is nothing hid, which shall not be manifested; neither was any thing kept secret, but that it should come abroad" (Mark 4:22); to modern revelation: "But they reside in the presence of God, on a globe like a sea of glass and fire, where all things for their glory are manifest, past, present, and future, and are continually before the Lord" (D&C 130:7).

Manifestation, or revelation, is vital to a Mormon's understanding of the Lord's Gospel. It is by the Holy Ghost we receive a testimony of Jesus, it by a personal witness, a personal manifestation that we receive an understanding of all things true. So how does that apply to our works of art? As a writer and a dramatist, I've had many experiences like the one stated above, where I've felt that the Lord was assisting me in my writing. Does this make it scripture? No, I don't think so.

I once had a conversation with a very talented playwright on this subject. He related a personal, spiritual experience with his writing where he felt specifically inspired, but then said that this in no way obligated anybody to feel in any way spiritually connected to his work, or to even like it. Which I completelty agree with. Too many times people think that just because something is supposedly "spiritual" that it somehow obligates them to feel a certain way about it. No, I think the Lord is more personal than that, "blessing us according to our desires." But in my mind, that didn't make it any less of a revelation to my playwright friend... just a personal revelation.

As an artist and a writer, I am not a prophet to the Church. I have no authority to receive any revelation for anyone beyond my stewardship. However, personal revelation IS my right. The scriptures are filled with such promises. I can receive revalation that relates to my personal life, work and experiences. I believe an architect, a plumber, a refrigerator salesman, a parent, etc. all have the same right, to ask for help from the Lord to magnify their efforts and make quality work. Obviously, a lot of what we do in our professions does not have a proselyting purpose. I'm a teacher, so it is not appropriate for me to be slipping Book of Mormons to my students. Nor should most of my plays have a proselyting purpose. But when we call on the Lord, we can still have his Spirit, his manifestations, inspire us to make a beautiful, quality work. A well made play to me is just as much of a revelation from God as a well made computer.

Sometimes I feel that we shy too much away from the more esoteric elements of our lives. The mysterious manifestations that occur and are difficult to explain to an unbeliever (or, very often, even a believer). Obviously, we never want to "cast our pearls before swine," unless we put the things of God up to ridicule. But those deeply beautiful moments of light ought not to be ignored either. When we cultivate a spirituality, a connection to the divine, our whole lives are made bright.

Many people look around embarrassed when I pull out experiences like the one with my play Manifest. It's become a kind of taboo subject to talk about certain kinds of spiritual experiences. Which is understandable, many people don't want to be labeled a nut job or an extremist. But I am sure grateful for the experiences I have had. Sure, the Gospel makes sense to me intellectually. Sure, the morality of the Church improves my life. But there is something so much deeper. So much more personal. I believe God talks to me, even when I'm not listening. Just as I believe He talks to you, even when you're not listening. He's crying in the wilderness, crying our names. His voice is not heard on the wind, nor in the gentle crackling of the fireside. His voice is not heard in the echoes of the king or the pounding of the drums. His voice is not heard even in something as intangible and personal as our imaginations or emotions. Dig deeper, it's even deeper... He will reveal Himself, and you will realize that there's a Presence there with you. You will realize that He is made manifest.

Reasons: Establishing the Tone

...I will reason as with men in days of old, and I will show unto you my strong reasoning. Wherefore, hearken ye together and let me show unto you even my wisdom--the wisdom of him whom ye say is the God of Enoch, and his brethren.... Wherefore, hearken and I will reason with you, and I will speak unto you and prophesy, as unto men in days of old.
-- Doctrine and Covenants 45: 1-11, 15

To immerse yourself in a subject is a dangerous thing, especially when that subject is a part of your core belief systems. To strive to understand such a subject in depth can often lead to a de-mystification process, a debunking of myths, an all out re-ordering of your world view and precious beliefs. However, it can also lead to deepening understanding; a more mature and seasoned perspective; a soulful engagement, a deeper love. Both sides of the spectrum have defined my relationship with my faith in Mormonism (what I consider the Restored Gospel of Christ) the past several years. An "agony and ecstasy" of putting aside cultural imperfections, while entwining myself like ivy even more to the trunk of the tree.

This blog is coming out of me as a response to the struggles of my friends and loved ones who have wrestled with the Mormon faith. Some were born in the Church, but have since left it quietly. Some have left the Church, and then turned fiercely against it. Some stay within the Church, but struggle in silent desperation as they try to find a way to keep alive or re-kindle their old belief, despite what they may see as contradictions or hypocrisies. Some investigated the Church because of an initial interest or spiritual experience, but then for one reason or another lost that momentum. Some are strongly believing members who simply struggle with some doctrine or policy, while others have never had anything but an antagonistic relationship to the Church. I hope to engage with many people within this wide spectrum of experience. I don't expect to entirely convince everyone of my believer's perspective, but I do believe that I'm equipped to at least start a deeper dialogue about Mormonism, whether one chooses to believe it or not. Thus I have created this blog to engage those who have some sort of relationship to Mormonism and desire to understand the perspective of a believer, even if they are essentially not a believer themselves. Whether one is an orthodox Latter-day Saint, a secular atheist, an Evangelical, a Muslim, a member of an off shoot of Mormonism, an inactive Mormon (or a former one), a neo-pagan, or anything else, I hope that one could find something of value from understanding the world view of this believing Mormon.

This is not necessarily a proselyting blog (although I certainly wouldn't mind if people came to embrace Mormonism more fully because of it either). Yet I do hope that it will at least help people understand why an academically minded, intelligent, compassionate, tolerant and spiritual person might believe in the Book of Mormon, Joseph Smith and the "restored Gospel," without relegating such a person to a member of a deranged cult or under the influence of a misguided delusion. I've strived to immerse myself in Church History, doctrine, culture, art and spirituality the past several years and have had to encounter for myself the difficulties and glories of being a Mormon. So I'm coming from a relatively informed position, having had to discard many of my more simplistic models of Mormonism. This, I believe, has deepened my faith, while still giving me room to understand and empathize with those who do not believe.

I don't plan to sugar coat any of my entries... this is as much of a journey as an explanation, a chronicle of struggles as well as a declaration of belief. As a playwright, as an amateur Mormon Historian, as a inquisitive mind, and as an intense spiritual seeker, I've had to ask myself the hard questions to center myself as a faithful Mormon. The intricasies of Church History, of former practices such as racial exclusion or polygamy, of current controversies, or of personal heartaches, are not new or superficial subject matter to me. Anyone who has seen my plays knows that I do not shy away from difficult questions. However, in the end, I believe that God answers the difficult questions, which, in the end, is why I'm a believer.

In this blog, I will chronicle that belief. Many of the entries will be more academic, while others will be intensely personal and spiritual. I will talk about books, history, culture, art, dreams and what I consider to be intimately spiritual manifestations. What I may write about may make some people uncomfortable. What I may write about may make people think that I'm absolutely, raving mad. But I'm going to take that risk. Because if I can at least bring some understanding to the WHY of my belief, then I will feel a certain level of accomplishment. I hope that my position will be respected, as I've tried to respect the positions of others. So I hope all comments and dialogue will remain civil, kind and engaging. Contention is not what I want from this, but rather a manifestation of my faith. In the end I think we all hope to be understood:

For intelligence cleaveth unto intelligence; wisdom receiveth wisdom; truth embraceth truth; virtue loveth virtue; light cleaveth unto light; mercy hath compassion on mercy and claimeth her own...
--Doctrine and Covenant 88:40